I KNOW WHAT YOU DRANK LAST SUMMER……AND IT WASN’T ENOUGH GREEK WINE
Ah, the slasher film. Actors in their 30’s playing teenagers getting gruesomely whacked one by one all while trying to have sex with each other. It is a formula that, just like killer in those movies, just won’t die.
So I thought in the spirit of one the great slasher films “I Know What You Did Last Summer”, I would scare you a bit by informing you I know what you have been drinking this summer, and I am calling you out for it. (No, I will not be butchering anyone with a hook. I am not that crazy, yet)
So, I know you drank tons of Sauvignon Blanc, various stripes of Chardonnay, and heaven forbid, lots of vapid Pinot Grigio. What you did not drink enough of was Malagousia, Vidiano, and the ultimate Greek summer sipper, Assyrtiko. Now don’t tell me the excuse that they are hard to find or lamer still, difficult to pronounce and thus scare you away. I call shenanigans! If you can learn the latest TikTok dance, you can learn how to say Vidiano. Suck it up, buttercup. Greek white wines were made for summer and while it is still warm out, get out there and drink a few, you will thank me later and not get brutally murdered, which is what may happen if you don’t. I’m not sayin’, I’m just sayin’.
What you can also do to save yourself from a horrifying end is get a jump on fall and start drinking Greek orange and red wines. This will get you in with the cool kids and save you from the hook-wielding psycho lurking on your block. Orange wines made from grapes like Roditis, Muscat of Alexandria, or Debina and turned into semi-sparkling wonders like Glinavos “Paleokerisio” which are so divine it is scary.
You can also explore Greek reds. Grapes like Vlahiko, Mouchtaro, and Agiorgtiko may seem hard to grasp but I assure you that they are not. Who cares if you can barely say it, no one will care when they are flattened by the incredible flavors of the wines. Plus, you will be famous for “bringing the slamming wine no one could say”. That’s fame in wine circles.
So, avoid a horror film ending. Save yourself from the terror of drinking more boring wine this fall. Avoid the proverbial bloodbath of showing up with another Pinot Noir to the dinner party. Drink Greek. If you don’t, I’ll know………